Better sit down for this one -- somehow leaving Las Vegas I knew I was gonna roll Snake Eyes.
Despite not being, well suuuper familiar with the type, I opted to transition into the B757 from Flight Factor for this flight. Having just plunked down 20Euro for Navigraphs AIRAC subscription I was confident I'd have all the latest SID/STAR and nav data I could desire - and I did. I happily programmed the FMC for the BOACH5.HEC RIIVR2 at FL280 departing 19R, got my cleared as filed (sweet it's great being an ATP!) clearance and told the flight attendants to sit everybody down...
Huh, FMC says "Unable Flight Level" or somesuch. No idea why that popped up surely these turbofans and 125 passengers and 50k lbs of fuel can get up to FL280 - no idea how to overide this so...ignore.
Takeoff was just great except at this point VNAV mode fails with some "perf error"...no problemo LNAV and Set ALT will work just fine for me on the MCP baby..."That was close! "I think as I slam the nose down at 6990 about to blast through the 7000 cap at ROPPR ! Phew better be careful I think as I distractedly play around with the FMC trying to figure out what the heck and YIKES that's 250 ((maybe even 251;) as I'm passing 8000! Slam back the throttle to avoid a speeding ticket flip off auto throttle..this is turning into a handful. Climb! Add back the power set 240 SPD. Auto throttle engage,and just barely scrape across 13000 at BOACH. I glare menacingly at my inflatable Co-pilot Otto, "thanks for nothing!"
Things settle down and I climb right up to FL280 (slowly) as I've kept 240 SPD set (if it aint broke...) wondering which Rwy I'll get to assigned to land on and how to spend the layover in LA...
Get my game face on at HEC knowing things will start to speed up - literally as I go to SPD 280k and descend really early to be at GRAMM at FL180 (Of course, Center was weak and unreadable just then and oh the joy at this point my yoke PTT button decides it will disconnect me for holding it too long while talking..reconnect, rebroadcast my last comms of course the GRAMM restricions!) to confirm...starting to get hectic as the inflatable copilot sleeps off his hangover and VNAV is seemingly untrustworthy.
And then - it really hits the fan - suddenly and for NO reason I can fathom the plane starts a sharp right 180 passing GRAMM when it should be heading to RUSTT -- What the ! I glance in real terror at the FMC and suddenly the the DEST is KLAS! Aaaa! How the heck did that happen? * Thinking maybe I somehow popped into a RTE2 I mash the RTE button but there is no other route! My KLAS-KLAX flight plan is GONE! Craaaap. I snap off autopilot alarms blaring, oh crap, oh crap.
what'smyheadingwhatsmyaltitudewhere's the airway! I've got to get the FMC back No I've got to FLY the Plane But Where's HASBO - the MAP range was set to 10 or 20 and I've got a blank screen staring at me with nothing and 300 or so heading 'alluva' sudden. And of course ATC calls at this point to let me know I'm cleared on the 25L at RIIVR and to report RIIVR. With my best airline captain voice and trying to cover the alarm sounds in the cockpit (for AUTO disconnect) I happily read back...I'm somewhere between GRAMM and RUSTT at FL180ish 280kts
I know what you are thinking I could have just hit alt hold but of course I didn't and I manually flew and had some nice 2000+ 2000- FPS moments and 30 degree bank angles as tried to keep the panic down and fly the inverse of 068 (why is that so hard to calculate in your head in panic mode? I initially came up with 268 Doh! How wide is the airway? Are they going to bust me! How far off am I!? Aaack. Where am I!! Expanded the map range with X-planes maddening click/slide/twist torture,kept from going inverted somehow, frantically reprogrammed the FMC for KLAX destination, What runways was that again?? 25L or 24L???
And of course this is when there are about 100 intersections. Determined to pick one course of action and stick with it and completely terrified of the autopilot/fmc now I decide to hand fly the beast! Unaware of my panic, and gently nudging me that I should have reported RIIVR, ATC asks me to confirm I'm on the ILS25L (aha 25L!) You betcha! (just a little high and freaked out!)
Being in serious manual mode I quickly flip through my virtual approach plates and look down and back to set the ILS/LOC freq on the panel and the approach course while pointing the nose of the plane towards the jumble of letters all squished together on the MAP dispay now that the @#@# range is too big! And here I make another key mistake...I tune in LOC freq 111.1 and incidentally crs 249 not 251 on the radio...111.1 is of course the ILS for 25 RIGHT! 249 is a "mis"twist xplane-ism. Anyway I miraculously kept from busting any minimums on my waavy approach (why wont the localizer center - it keeps being just a hair off to the right, I think while scanning for visual of the twy environment). Of course I'm high as a kite and FAST at 226kts about 6 miles out before I drop everything including the anchor attached to the rear lavatory to slow down and get down...at about 6 miles I decide to ignore my lying instruments and trust my eyes (after literally zooming in to check the pavement 25L numbers (!)) to triple confirm that I'm lined up on the proper runway! Dive bomb approach ensues. Touchdown at about 180 (on centerline I might add

Rollout to the end of the runway (where is that thrust reverser mapped to!?) and just laugh as ATC congratulates me on my pass...Hope they don't read these things...
Todd
http://peaware.pilotedge.net/flight.cfm?id=81889
* EDIT - I think I know what might have happened. Receiving my landing rwy ILS 25L at KLAX I attempted to program the FMC with ILS 25L via the Departure/Arrivals button --- and I bet I hit the wrong Line Select Key -- hitting the top one ARR-KLAS instead of the 2nd ARR-KLAX! (maybe - my systems knowledge is weak). This may just be the result of me reprogramming midflight. dunno.